Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Randomize
