she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
