Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
My vagina just recognized that song.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Randomize
