I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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