what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
