He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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