Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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