meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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