id be glad to
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
