Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
