Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
