Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize