Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
