stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
