i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
