I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
