how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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