So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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