I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
