So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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