I just threw up on my dentist
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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