It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
third nipple confirmed
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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