It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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