you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
