Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
