IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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