respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
A+ Viking dick
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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