So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
