its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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