The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
