My first STD was from a foam party
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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