I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
