I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Are we still banned from the library?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
