I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
