the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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