Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Randomize
