bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
