We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
