Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
