her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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