yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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