he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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