she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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