Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Randomize
