Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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