Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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