And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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