God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize