He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
