Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
