Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize